4
Apr
Steve Jobs is publicly against it, wireless carriers don’t want to endorse it, but as long as the internet’s involved, portable devices will inevitably be loaded up with the hottest, sexiest, and tiniest porn available. It’s already big in Europe and Asia, but portable porn hasn’t quite surged forward in America. Will it? Is the iPhone the device to carry it through?
With a big viewing area, the iPhone’s might have a screen just big enough. The Sony PSP, a contender in the portable porn market, clocks in with a 480 X 272 high resolution screen, comparable to the iPhone’s 480 X 320. The extra might help kick it out of “this is stupid small” and into an acceptable “hold it three inches front of your face” option. That, combined with easy internet access, takes care of the basics. (As for where to go on the web to find it, just head on over to the number one access point for iPhone porn sites: Google)
What about the iPhone’s whole touch potential? Sure, nipple twisting fingerprint circles on a smooth, cold, flat surface while sitting on a toilet in a mall bathroom might trigger a “EUREKA! I feel low” moment, but maybe there’s something to integrating touch with some kind of porn hacked application. We can all hang back until the Japanese sort out that whole avenue.
As for portable porn in general, there are upsides, and downsides. On the plus side, a phone’s a much more personal and private a device than a computer, less likely to be household/shared. Ironically, another advantage is that it’s much more public if you want it to be. Beer + iPhone porn = giggles among friends. And, fact is, if you ever “need” porn, you’ve always… got it… see, that’s just it, I’m not sure how I feel about the idea of having porn with me at all times. That’s committing to a lifestyle right there, like… I dunno… carrying a flask. Not only does having it in your phone create a whole new type of paranoia and set of porn-tracks to cover, but if you do get caught, all traits in the outward personality you’ve cultivated over the years will crumble in irrelevance under your new public identity as “guy who carries porn with him wherever he goes”. Still, it’s better than being the guy who keeps a “beaver shot” in his wallet.
The irony is that sticking a bikini babe as your wallpaper is still fairly socially acceptable, with womankind generally resigned to a “boys will be boys” attitude about covered nipples. But what happens when those bikini babes come to life?
I can’t help picture the ever so liberal “boys will be boys” attitude quickly dissolving with the knowledge that boys are carrying around their very own portable lap dancers. And these girls don’t ask for money when they’re done.
April 4th, 2008 at 4:19 pm
That squeegee babe can wash my iPhone anytime!
April 4th, 2008 at 4:22 pm
Men are pigs.
April 4th, 2008 at 11:56 pm
I really don’t know why they want it with them all the time. Porn on a computer is good enough. This would be very dangerous, with all the sexually-charged teens, porn would probably be exchanged between adolescents in schools.
April 5th, 2008 at 2:25 am
oink oink
x
April 5th, 2008 at 4:19 am
iPhone: The Next Step in Portable Porn | nerdd.net…
\r\nSneaking porn into the mind through the palm: Europe and Asia are doing it. Why cant we?\r\nAs f…
April 5th, 2008 at 1:25 pm
Cell Phone News.
http://cellphone-news-and-reviews.blogspot.com/
April 5th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
@ hamidious: porn already gets exchanged at schools. in my day it was vhs tapes and magazines that started making the rounds in, idk, 6th grade?
April 5th, 2008 at 1:33 pm
I love porn and i watch it all the time on my PSP.
April 5th, 2008 at 1:34 pm
> porn would probably be exchanged between adolescents in schools…
oh my $deity … you mean, in schools? By boys hitting puberty? You mean they could no longer be interested in bible studies or kite flying?
I am aware that US Americans tend to be somewhat prudish, but hey, I simply refuse to imagine you don’t have your fair share of pornography before hitting your legal age over there.
Stuff like that will happen. Get over it.
April 5th, 2008 at 1:56 pm
um. i already have it on my blackberry. why is this such an incredibly new idea?
April 5th, 2008 at 2:10 pm
Humans are the vilest animals on the planet, all of us should be killed off.
April 5th, 2008 at 2:15 pm
[…] Sneaking porn into the mind through the palm: Europe and Asia are doing it. Why can’t we?http://www.mobilecommandos.com/apple/iphone-the-next-step-in-portable-porn/” rel=”dc:sou… […]
April 5th, 2008 at 2:16 pm
@SonyaStar
Oh shut up. This is the way men were designed, and if you don’t like it, never have sex with one again. While you’re at it, you should burn your bra in a protest to “fight the power”.
April 5th, 2008 at 2:20 pm
OMG I love the idea of an iWash. How about an iWash for a small PC LCD screen?
April 5th, 2008 at 2:20 pm
# hamidious Says:
April 4th, 2008 at 11:56 pm
I really don’t know why they want it with them all the time. Porn on a computer is good enough. This would be very dangerous, with all the sexually-charged teens, porn would probably be exchanged between adolescents in schools.
i like how you say would…. like its not already… lol
April 5th, 2008 at 2:23 pm
I use my iphone to wank at work. Thank you steve jobs
April 5th, 2008 at 2:39 pm
porn serves an awesome purpose that everyone should encourage, it allows teens to be sexual with themselves without the dangers of STIs or drugs or dangerous relationships. teens ARE going to be sexual, whether you like it or not, we all have hormones and males especially peak around this age. how awesome would it be if you knew your kids weren’t going to get pregnant(get someone else pregnant) and they were just masturbating?
also,
@hamidious:
its not like the kids aren’t sharing porn at home on the internet, or at least downloading it..
April 5th, 2008 at 2:43 pm
It’s of course very, very important to tell others what to do with their lives. We just can’t — gosh — let people have fun. We have to control and dominate everything. Someone somewhere is having a good time, and hey, that can’t be right.
April 5th, 2008 at 3:08 pm
my guess, the carriers are to lawsuit scared.
it seems that if one cant sue the supplier one sue the transport company or something like that (i would not be surprised if there is a history of lawsuits aimed at the postal service and similar for transporting movies and magazines with adult content).
but then US carriers are more control freaks to. they say what handssets are allowed and so on. so in a way they tie themselves to whatever content come over the airwaves, no matter if its third party or not. or at least in the minds of the users it can become like that…
April 5th, 2008 at 3:13 pm
I already carry porn around on my mp3 player. It’s good for laughs with mates and for a bit of relief when by myself lol. I love porn and any girl I’m with just has to accept that or move on. I can’t stand insecure princesses!
April 5th, 2008 at 3:22 pm
This can be used in very embarrassing ways by kids in school. Girls can be taunted and harrassed by immature boys who think it’s funny to play these videos in public.
NOT GOOD
April 5th, 2008 at 3:26 pm
I don’t understand what the big deal is about that… it’s a chick in a bikini “washing” your iPhone. She’s wearing a bikini, and it’s not like a spanish one. It’s something you see if you goto L.A. or whatever…
Besides, it’s a tit, there’s nothing wrong with it. It hurts your kids mind if they are told it’s “dirty”. Plus if you forbid it, they will find a way (internet) anyway…
Solution, education. Make them familiar with it, have respect for it, there you go.
April 5th, 2008 at 4:27 pm
mAN ARE pigs…. Stfu dam feminists
April 5th, 2008 at 4:29 pm
you forgot the url
and the problem is that it’s too slow over Hedge and video are the same for more than 3 month… Give me 3G to get it faaaaaster ^_^
April 5th, 2008 at 4:53 pm
scums.
April 5th, 2008 at 5:00 pm
dudes…. this is complete idiocy since i think porn objectifies women… but like, kids in school watch porn all the time, and i dont think this is really relevant cus like, they dont need their iphones for porn, like u can just download it to ur computer and put it on any media device…
April 5th, 2008 at 5:11 pm
I have an adult website for the iphone!
http://www.frankenlinks.com/iphoneindex.html
If you have any suggestions, please let me know.
April 5th, 2008 at 5:54 pm
“This would be very dangerous, with all the sexually-charged teens, porn would probably be exchanged between adolescents in schools.”
Yea, they would get so horny they would.. punch someone in the face?
April 5th, 2008 at 6:04 pm
@SonyaStar
And Women are prostitutes, if not for money then for “love”.
April 5th, 2008 at 6:20 pm
[…] Via […]
April 5th, 2008 at 6:49 pm
hamidious wrote:”I really don’t know why they want it with them all the time. Porn on a computer is good enough. This would be very dangerous, with all the sexually-charged teens, porn would probably be exchanged between adolescents in schools.”
@hamidious: God you are naive, What do you think they are exchanging now? Shiny flower-stickers?
April 5th, 2008 at 7:26 pm
If these were two glass cleaning guys on on a hanging platform this would be stellar.
April 5th, 2008 at 10:36 pm
Actually, it’s already here.
Checkout my site - http://screwphone.com.
Always available for interviews.
April 5th, 2008 at 10:48 pm
in my country, porn is all the norm in men’s cellphones. it’s being downloaded, shared, and shown to beer buddies. i don’t know what’s the big deal with this article.
April 5th, 2008 at 11:03 pm
@SonyaStar
And women are whores! It all evens out! You sell i buy
April 6th, 2008 at 12:39 am
I see she missed a spot in the bottom right corner..tut tut
April 6th, 2008 at 1:19 am
hey Sonya Star if you want to say men are pigs that’s fine, but i may point out that you make us that way by parading around our iphones in bikinis washing our screens… long story short if you have a problem with us going gaga at your boobs stop enlarging them and pushing them together in a v cut shirt
April 6th, 2008 at 2:11 am
hell people are pigs.
but watching sex doesn’t make you a pig by any stretch.
you should know, porker.
April 6th, 2008 at 8:18 am
Holy cow. The Ipod with it’s touch screen capabilities and porn could be huge. Never thought of that. That beats the PSP hands down.
April 6th, 2008 at 10:23 am
Hey “a man”, let me point out the fact that most women who are in the sex industry would not do the work they do if they could get a job outside of it where they do not get paid 75 cents to every dollar that a man makes. Stripping and porn is unfortunately an easy way that a woman can pay her way through college or help her family survive. It is also an emotionally damaging and dangerous industry. If a man is going to get angry at me for saying this, that’s fine. I’m not saying that you should stop watching porn, but I certainly wouldn’t be aroused at voyeristically watching the exploitation of young women for profit. If that’s your scene then go ahead.
As far as this porn on the iPhone thing, I just think this whole thing has gone too far. Why would you need porn to be portable? How pathetic have people become??
April 6th, 2008 at 10:25 am
Waiting for an interactive and touch sensitive porn(Gamle) LOL
April 6th, 2008 at 11:55 am
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April 6th, 2008 at 12:05 pm
>Humans are the vilest animals on the
>planet, all of us should be killed off.
You first.
April 6th, 2008 at 4:12 pm
Porn on iPhone? Old news. Apple’s clients have always been known as the losers going through life w/ thier dick in their hands.
April 6th, 2008 at 6:15 pm
“Men are pigs” yeah? well women are CUNTS!
April 7th, 2008 at 10:20 am
Porn is coming to the iPhone whether apple wants it or not, they hold it from iTunes, but that didn’t stop porn podcasting either.
I hope Steve will once see how big a market porn really is.
Until then I try to help the iPhone Porn quest with http://www.iphoneporngrid.com
April 8th, 2008 at 5:17 am
[…] That was the week in lumps, a week in which: a US man sold the domain pizza.com and got $2.6 million for it, Velvet Revolver split with vocalist Scott Weiland, a Saudi man killed his daughter for being on Facebook, Dubai now has the tallest skyscraper in the world (and the 140th floor view is impressive too), Edgar Wright and Simon Pegg are making another film together, could this be the easiest job ever? Football Manager has arrived for the Xbox, but this aside, the Telegraph still say the PS3 is currently on top, and I very nearly wrote about this article about the iPhone and porn, but the original is better. […]
April 9th, 2008 at 3:26 pm
[…] - The Blowfish Blog 65 Interesting Sex Facts - Perils Of Pleasure The Next Step In Portable Porn - Mobile Commandos Exploring Thailand’s Happy Endings - Downtown Diary 100 Signs You’re In The Wrong […]
April 14th, 2008 at 11:00 am
@Proud Feminist
Funny how you justify the very method that feeds man’s egos.
You may be a proud feminist but I doubt other feminists are proud of you.
June 17th, 2008 at 12:37 pm
It’s inevitable. Just check out this site.
http://www.teensaunaturel.com